We all know when we're being completely honest to ourselves and those around us. We all know how it feels when we are behaving completely and utterly in the best interests of everyone, including ourselves. We all know the difference between behaving appropriately and inappropriately - or we would if we were mindful enough to be alert to what is going on in the present moment.

The ordinary person - dictated to by his or her ordinarily automated mind - behaves automatically, often repetitively, sometimes compulsively or addictively: it is how we are "wired". Without this facility for automated behaviour, we would never make it through the day. What if, on our way to work, we stopped in early-morning traffic awestruck by the sight of the rising sun? What if we were so genuinely interested in the person next to us at work that we got no work done? What if we were so utterly mindful that everything stopped for fifteen minutes each time we drank a cup of coffee to drink a cup of coffee? Being mindless gets us through the day - not much else but, at least, it has that to recommend itself! Herein lies the paradox between being automated and authentically focused - the trade-off between mindfulness and effectiveness - the difference between making it through the day and achieving great things day in, day out.

Let's home in on one key phrase: the trade-off between mindfulness and effectiveness. Surely, to be truly effective one needs to be mindful - isn't that what everything I talk about boils down to? NO! You can be totally mindful and be of no use to anybody, including yourself. Buddhists mindfulness exercises, like going for a walk to go for a walk or formal meditation, are not a blueprint for effective living - they are a training exercise to enable you live effectively. When I urge you to be clear-minded during the course of the day to ensure that you behave appropriately, I'm not urging you to be empty-minded.

The trade-off between mindfulness and effectiveness is where pure mindfulness and purpose meet: pure mindfulness is what you experience during meditation - it's like a tennis player or golfer hitting the perfect, uninhibited stroke during practice; purposeful mindfulness is the application of that state of mind when the pressure is on, in the real game - in our case, the game of life.

When you are purposeful mindful you cannot but be authentic, you cannot but act (which is a world away from react) in everyone's best interests - inasmuch as that is humanly possible - you cannot but be truly effective. The development of pure mindfulness through meditation enables us, through adding today's purpose to the mix, be purposefully mindful when it matters because what matters in your life is happening right now.

Three questions you could ask yourself right now:

• How do I feel, now?
• Have I behaved appropriately so far today?
• Is what I've been doing for the last hour or so been the right thing to be doing?

Purposeful mindfulness requires constant checking and recalibration - at least until your development of pure mindfulness enables you flow throughout the day - you need to keep pulling yourself up and pushing yourself further. Not only is this challenging, it makes that life more exciting by taking you to place you might not otherwise go. After all, purposefull mindfulness will enable you excel yourself, effortlessly.

Changing how you operate, or how your mind operates you, will change everything in your life. But to take the steps to make that change you need to know two things:

• Why do I need to change?
• What steps do I need to take?

I'm in Dublin again on November 11th for my one-day Workshop, The Psychology of Success, with the sole purpose of answering those questions for you and, in the process, enabling you live life effortlessly... more details here...