We create our lives one moment at a time. Normally, we do this automatically and up being "not so bad". Take the next moment to be present non-automatically. Disengage the autopilot by paying attention to what's going on around you non-judgementally. Simply experience the moment. This will set you up to be able to figure out what's actually going on in real time - thus enabling you create your life by choice.

• Purposefully focus - it doesn't come naturally, we're actually "wired" to not focus
• Set goals in a way that energizes your subconscious into focused effortless action
• Make your very best decisions and solve problems with ease - your brain can do this effortlessly
• Banish stress - we're ordinarily "wired" to be stressed

I spent a day with a client in Germany's Black Forest just over a week ago. During our day, he learned that one of his best friends had passed away. I subsequently mentioned to him that, as he attended the funeral, he would hear the legendary words "in the midst of life we are in death" - part of the Christian burial liturgy. And, of course, nothing could be more true - the one thing of which we are absolutely sure is that we will die. In fact, we are now both closer to our deaths than when I started writing this and you started reading it.

That is why we need to take all the steps we can to ensure that, for now, in the midst of life, we are actually in life. Otherwise, it simply and effortlessly passes by. All to often, people say to me that, at moments of loss, they wish they appreciate what they have and live their lives accordingly. But appreciation of what we have should never be comparative: look at how lucky I am to be alive when someone else has died; look at how lucky I am to be healthy when someone else is ill; look at how good I have it in my job in comparison to someone who has lost theirs! We tend to think comparatively, evaluate by comparison and view everything judgementally.

Hence today's Quick Tip - we need to stop "experiencing" what passes for our lives judgementally or, more to the point, prejudgementally - because our judgements relate to the matrix of "facts" we have stored in our heads since our childhood. We need to appreciate the moment absolutely - in the judgement-free experience of the reality of now. This is the essence of mindfulness and this ability transforms our experience of the present moment and, seeing as we create our lives in the present moment, this qualitatively changes our lives.

How do I appreciate what I have in the middle of the ordinary crap of everyday life when the death or illness of a friend is the farthest thing from my mind? By meditating, meditating, meditating!